Tuesday, September 16, 2014

No. 66 -- Jesse Houston, Backseat Stalker

You know those moments in movies where somebody gets behind the wheel of their car, and when they look in the rear view mirror, there's an intruder looming in the shadows of the backseat?You know how it always scares the living bejeebers out of the driver?

Yeah ... that happened to me tonight.

Jeanie left the house early to pick Adam up at football practice, and I thought Jesse had gone with her. After checking a couple of quick e-mails, I headed out to my car so the four of us could meet in a few minutes for dinner.

There's nobody in the passenger's seat. I put the key in the ignition ... look up into the mirror ... see the outline of somebody I did not know was in the car ... and at that split second ...

Hey, Dad!

Jesse always sits directly behind me when we're going somewhere, and more often than not, will start to sit there even if it's just the two of us. That's what he did tonight, and the thing is, he did not mean to intentionally frighten me. If he had, surely, it would not have worked nearly as well.

My car very nearly became a convertible when I jumped, trying to escape the "danger." I guess I should be proud, because I neither cussed nor peed in the floor in the process! Jesse couldn't stop laughing once he was sure that I was not, in fact, having a heart attack.

Me? Not so much.

Friday, July 18, 2014

No. 65 -- Blue Moon

Adam just ran through the house in his drawers, happened to bend over ... and just like that, we discover a huge and strategically placed hole in the drawers that show for all the world to see that, yes, he is in fact most definitely a boy.

Me, Jeanie and her mom and dad are laughing so hard we're all crying, which of course just eggs him on. There's nothing that kid won't do to get a laugh, which Jeanie says will make him the perfect frat boy someday.


Hey, y'all. Watch this. 

Jesse is also laughing hysterically and starts yelling, "My eyes! My eyes!" This is what it's like to live at my house.

No. 64 -- Jesse's Untold Tales of the ER

The boys and I came across one of those television shows where kids who've gotten in trouble get taken to jail to see if it will possibly turn them around. Jesse watched a few minutes and said that if he ever got in that much trouble, he would probably wind up on television but it wouldn't be on something like Scared Straight.

He's a man of few words, so it kind of got my attention. When I asked him why, he said, "If I ever mess up that bad, I'll have to go on Untold Stories of the ER so they can remove your foot from my butt."

Yep ... and I'm thankful he knows that.

Friday, June 27, 2014

No. 63 -- Crash. Reset. New Aircraft

Every time I pick up the control box for my RealFlight RC flight simulator, I think of my dad.

When he was sick, he passed a lot of time by working on a HUGE RC Piper Cub. This sucker was massive, and while I'm pretty sure he never actually flew it due to his health, he tried to do the next best thing and use RealFlight to simulate the experience.

My dad and I never had a lot in common, but that was something over which we could connect. When I visited him, it never took long to make my way to the computer to open the RealFlight program. Both he and my brother Doug made fun of me for not being able to land a plane ... and flying a helicopter? That was absolutely out of the question. Within seconds, I would always crash.

While Dad and Doug gave me a hard time about not being able to land, I absolutely gave it right back to my father.

Hey, Dad, I would begin. Remember that time you demolished that plane you spent so much time and money on?

Yeah? What about it?

I would start a new journey on RealFlight and right away spiral it into the ground.

Watch this.

Clicking the reset button on the control box, a brand-new aircraft would immediately appear on the screen.

Crash. Reset. New aircraft. 

Crash. Reset. New aircraft.

Crash. Reset. New aircraft.

He laughed.

After picking up a copy of RealFlight for my own computer, I'm now able to land an airplane on the runway ... most of the time. And helicopters? I'm still no pro ... but for your viewing pleasure ... I present to you the results of a lot of practice.


I typically fly a Huey, because that's the bird on which Dad flew so often in Vietnam. This isn't the prettiest flight you'll ever see, but ... hey ... I didn't crash.

This one's for you, Dad.